Sunday, November 18, 2012

One Step Forward

One of the reasons I decided I would start my own public blog is because I had the honor of two stories being featured on Bob Wingate's Blog, i.e. the founder of Bound and Gagged magazine. He seemed to really enjoy both of the stories I submitted so I figured I would also share the first one here since it seems to be the perfect launching point.

While I had been tied up before this incident, this was the moment in which I realized "Yes, I like guys." Up until that point I thought I just wanted to be tied up by them, nothing sexual. I've talked to straight guys who have had a similar outlook - they don't get anything out of sex, but they do have this urge to try bondage with another guy. It'd be interesting to see whether women have felt the same towards other women, or whether this is a cultural thing, but for now I'll just share one of the first biggest steps I made towards embracing my sexuality.

Original article is here. Happy and safe playing.

 Like a good number of your readers, I became interested in bondage at a young age. I was excited whenever my favorite shows featured a heroic character getting bound and gagged (Inspector Gadget was the biggest one; I remember I imagined myself as a friend of Penny, the titular character’s niece, and getting tied up with her on a regular basis). When I got a bit older, I started writing stories with the heroes getting tied up frequently, and also stories in which I wrote myself into them. The thing that was strange to me, though, was that despite how I was also interested in girls, I only wanted to get tied up by guys. I had no interest of getting involved sexually (whether anal, oral, or even just kissing); I just wanted to be tied up. But as I got older, that reticence turned into curiosity and doubt. Was I as straight as I thought?

I could recount some of the times in which I was tied up by friends before, but last year was the first time in which I really started exploring the kinky side of myself. It was something that had made me nervous, but I was fortunate in that I had processed all of this before going in and talked with some friends who either were active (to varying degrees) in kink or who were understanding though not necessarily kinky. I joined Fetlife first, met someone who is still a friend who showed me the ropes (literally), and after a good first encounter with him I ended up meeting someone new. He had found me and messaged that he was interested in tying me up at some point. I was, again, still a bit nervous but still followed through and agreed that I would meet up with him at a coffee place here in town. I made sure to let my aforementioned friend know where I was going and we agreed to touch base; this helped me feel a lot better about the experience. 

I met up with him at the coffee shop we agreed on, and he walked in right when I was ordering and looked exactly like his photo (you never can be sure with some people, and in his case, it was definitely a bonus). We talked for a while and got to know each other a bit more. After we talked, we decided to go on a walk, so I texted my friend to let him know where I was going. I told my date that I was texting my friend, and he was fine with that (a good sign). We went for a walk near the lake, talking a bit about different things, some BDSM-related but a good combination of different topics. It was then when I realized I was finally comfortable enough to take the plunge. I asked him if he wanted to do something that day.

After letting my friend know again, as well as a time to let him know if things were going okay, we went to his house. I remember how I felt on the way over: a combination of excited and nervous, one hand gripping the side of the leather seat in his car. When we got in, I had some water and let him know something else that was on my mind: “It’s okay if you take my clothes off.” 

So he got his things—rope and cuffs, mostly. Then he blindfolded me and started to caress me. And then he kissed me.

And I kissed him back.

Let me tell you something: this was the first time I kissed a man, and the first time in a long since I had kissed a woman. When he told me I was doing well, I could feel the walls begin to break down. For some time I let him kiss me as I hugged him. Eventually he had me take off my pants and shirt, and he remarked at how he was surprised how hairy I was. 

“Is that okay?”

“It’s not a problem at all.”

Since he was into the taste of sweat, he had me put on a sauna suit, which was surprisingly comfortable. He also put cuffs around my wrists, then lifted me over his shoulder and carried me down with him to the basement.

He put me down, then proceeded to shackle/tie me to the bars downstairs so I was standing up with my arms spread out. Then he caressed me some more, and kissed me all over (when he was at my lips, I kissed him too). He gagged me with a (clean) sock that he shoved in my mouth, slapped my ass a few times, but nothing too severe, and kept caressing and kissing me. Eventually the blindfold fell down from my eyes, so he laughed and retied it a bit. His shirt was already off. While he was caressing me, he called me his “little Houdini” and I asked him what he wanted me to call him, and he responded with Sir or Master. At the time, I wasn’t really turned on by the thought of calling someone my Master or Sir, but I didn’t care at that point. 

He remarked that despite the sauna suit being on, he was sweating more than I was so I laughed a bit and told him that I should have warned him about the fact I don’t sweat very easily. I then asked if he was going to punish me for not sweating enough, and he said he was. He led me upstairs (setting the cuffs aside), then removed the blindfold once I was in his bedroom. He removed the sauna pants and my underwear and spread me out over his lap on the bed and spanked my ass a few times. Then he pinned me down, continuing with the kissing (including sucking on my dick for a little bit, which I found myself not minding despite this being a first) and I told him that I could escape anything he put me in.

"Is that so?" he said. "Just wait here." So I waited for him and he came back with some industrial-strength Saran Wrap and some duct tape. He ripped off a strip of tape and put it over my mouth, then started wrapping me until he got up to my neck, rolled me onto the bed again, then pinned me down again. He kept daring me to try to get out, saying that I couldn't, that I was his little captive and not going to get away. Eventually the duct tape from my mouth got loose, but he added more on. I was able to wriggle around enough that I could get free and once I did, he asked me if (as a reward) I would like to cum. So I said yes.

And that was when things got difficult. Whether it was him stroking me or me stroking, I wasn’t able to do it. He spanked me a few more times for not reaching that point, then gagged me with his hand and then the sock again. Eventually I had to let my friend know again that everything was still fine (and in fact MORE than fine), so I did so (both of us now naked). Meanwhile, he put down the blanket on his leather sofa. He gagged me with a used sock, placed duct tape over it, duct-taped my hands, and sat me down on his lap. While I squirmed futilely, he continued to stroke me until finally I exploded all over. I took him up on his offer to towel off a bit, and he wiped the furniture, and then there was a moment where we were just standing there, embracing each other.

Eventually I went back upstairs again to get my pants, and he asked me if we could just have 5 minutes more. So we did, first with him on top of me, then me resting on his chest. He told me I was like a “little wolf” and we talked for a little bit. I remember I displayed my typical suave nature when he complimented my ass and asked what exercises I did, and I replied with “Uh, I don’t know. It just… ended up like that.” Very smooth.

Fortunately, he either found this awkwardness charming or didn’t mind regardless, because he expressed interest in meeting again after we both got dressed and I had a Coke from his fridge to recover a bit from all that was going on.

While we’ve crossed paths since then, we still haven’t played again. Regardless, I won’t forget that this marked a really important time for me. It led to me realizing how I had been denying the extent of my attraction to men, led to me wanting to explore more, and led to me start becoming more confident. I have had a few more experiences since then which opened my eyes further, but that was undeniably what I consider a major step forward for me.

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